With gods like these…

The Republican governor of Wisconsin, some douchebiscuit named Scott Walker, is all up in mah feedz for evading the subject of evolution during an interview with BBC Radio. When asked, “Are you comfortable with the idea of evolution, do you believe in it, do you accept it?” Walker replied, “For me, I’m going to punt on that one.”

Scott Walker is running for president of the US of A, and is presently leading in Iowa polling by likely Republican voters this year’s bumper crop of GOP clowns. To give you some idea of just how irredeemably fucked-up some of those Iowa Republican voters actually are, Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-idiculous) won the Ames straw poll among Iowa Republicans mere months before the 2012 Iowa caucuses. Of course, disbelieving evolution climate change science generally reality is a standard talking point among Republican hopefuls, because in a general election they need the support of the rabid right to win. And they do: they desperately need every single vote they can get—else why all the need for redistricting and constructing endless obstacles to prevent black and brown people from getting to the polls?

Governor Walker definitely hits all the standard right-wing notes. He infamously fucked the public sector unions in Wisconsin, and is fiercely anti-abortion including in cases of rape and incest. (Which reminds me, we could use a fresh organ donor in the Abattoir.)  He’s a big fan of abstinence-only sex education, and supports the right of pharmacists to refuse to fill birth control prescriptions on religious grounds. Naturally he’s against gay marriage, and even opposed a law allowing gay couples benefits such as hospital visitation rights. What a douche, amirite?

Anyway, the best take I’ve seen on this evolution-denying news—if one can even call it news—is a release from Annie Laurie Gaylor of the Freedom From Religion foundation (FFRF) [h/t Don Ardell]. In it she scoffs*:

This, said in country that commemorates the greatest scientist of all times [Charles Darwin], a product of their nation, on its ten-pound note? It wouldn’t be so bad if Walker was an anomaly. But as we religiously point out at FFRF, the United States is already so embarrassingly dummy-downed. Polls and surveys consistently reveal that from 42 to over 50% of adult U.S. citizens embrace creationism, and reject evolution.

In case you forgot for a moment the appalling state of ignorance in which your fellow citizens dwell, consider this a helpful reminder. (You’re welcome.)

And this is where things get darker:

Matt Rothschild reported in The Progressive, about Walker’s remarks in 2009 to the Madison Christian Businessmen’s Committee. Walker told them that by the age of 13, he realized: “I’m going to trust in you Christ to tell me where to go. And to the best of my ability I’m going to obey where you lead me.”

In painstaking detail, Walker listed that God dictated to him what jobs to take, who to marry (gee, how romantic), when to run for governor. Walker concluded that it’s all about “trust and obey.” Walker urged everyone “to turn your life over 100 percent to what Christ tells you what to do.”

Listen, pretty much everything I’ve heard about this Christ-god is just godawful. For one thing he is not even an American citizen, and therefore he has no business meddling in U.S. elections. Second of all, if these Walker-Bachmann-Dubya types are to be believed, Christ’s positions on the issues are terrible: virulently misogynist, racist, homophobic, anti-democratic and otherwise downright inhumane. Further, his economic policies are all about screwing over poor and working people, solely in order to further enrichen the rich. He even hates public transportation! Most damning of all, however, is Christ’s propensity to tell these motherfuckers like Scott Walker to run for office. In short: this god is an unrepentant asshole.

Also, if I still believed everything I did at age 13 and kept every commitment I made then, I’d still be smoking cigarettes, sneaking liquor from my parents’ stash and replacing it with water and fooling around with my next door neighbor Chris Reed. Jeezus.

Gaylor was quoted in that Progressive article:

“It is frightening that the highest executive in our state suffers from the delusion that God dictates his every move.”

Well, I would say it’s an open question whether Walker is deluded or just lying, a True Believer™ or a typical, run-of-the mill shitweasel like Obama. Either way, he’d fit right in with our most recent run of presidents.

*On a brighter note, we are ecstatic to see a more mocking tone emanating from our godless friends at FFRF, a welcome improvement that appears to coincide with the arrival at the organization of one Andrew Seidel.

IRIS Andrew Seidel.

And Annie Laurie Gaylor, of course. Go Team Godless.

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